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Helping Parents of Teens with Autism Talk about Dating and Sex: 5 Tips for Occupational Therapists

accessible sex education developmental disability inclusive occupational therapy occupationaltherapy sensory features sexual dialogues sexuality teens young adults Mar 17, 2023

The topic of dating and romance can be quite difficult to initiate with parents of adolescent clients, especially those with autism. However, as an occupational therapist (OT), you can help parents create a safe, calm, and judgment-free space for their teens to freely express their desires.

Here are five tips to help you initiate a healthy conversation about dating and sex with parents of teens with autism:

Use open & validating dialogue: Encourage parents to validate their teen's desires and create a safe and non-judgmental environment for open communication. Acknowledge the discomfort and awkwardness that parents might feel, and encourage them to persist through the discussions.
- Examples of things parents can say:“Yes, I know these feelings can be a little confusing or awkward," or “It’s ok, you’re just learning how to date or ask people out.”
Ask questions about your teen's dating interests: Use initial questions to help...

[Research Spotlight] LGBTQIA+ Affirmative Care: Upholding Professional Responsibilities

beliefs bias culturallyinclusiveadls culture diversity equality inclusive occupational therapy occupationaltherapy self-reflection sexual dialogues values Mar 14, 2023

I recently read an AJOT study that I couldn’t wait to share with you all as it shows the power of continuing education.

A study conducted last year by Bolding et al. (2022) examined the knowledge, clinical preparedness, and attitudinal awareness of occupational therapy practitioners, in regards to the LGBTQIA+ folks. This self-report study was broken down by category and found that on a scale of 1-7, respondents scored a mean of 4.7 in their Knowledge about queer populations, 4.4 in Clinical Preparedness, and 5.6 in Attitudinal Awareness.

There were a number of factors that contributed to respondents scoring significantly higher in all three sub-scales, including a graduate degree in OT, past or present experience in mental health settings, or respondents with a close friend or family member who identifies as SGM (sexual gender minorities e.g., agender, bisexual, gay, lesbian, gay, gender non-conforming, transgender). Academic preparedness and continuing education...

OTPF Body Structure and Function Highlight

bias intimacy occupational therapy occupationaltherapy pleasure preferences sex sexplay sexual dialogues Oct 15, 2022

Despite anecdotal evidence regarding the potential for pleasure from anal play, it remains a taboo subject in the context of female sexuality. This partly stems from the fact that we often associate anal pleasure specifically with anal sex, namely anal penetration of a penis, which can be a daunting proposition for a woman who has never experimented with any sort of anal stimulation.

But what if we looked at anal play as just as varied as the different flavors of ice cream and numerous options for toppings on an ice cream sundae??

Prior to their first experience with vaginal intercourse, most women experiment with other forms of vaginal and clitoral stimulation – be that masturbation, fingering, or oral sex with a partner – so why don’t we consider the potential for anal stimulation to be just as diverse and gradual?

To compound the issue, the research surrounding anal pleasure for women is influenced by this same...

Integrating Pleasure Throughout the Day

educational handouts occupational therapy occupationaltherapy pleasure preferences sensory features sex sexplay sexual activity sexual communication sexual dialogues sexuality Oct 15, 2022

The Occupational Therapy Practice Framework 4th edition define "routines" as:

"Routines For persons, groups, and populations: Patterns of behavior that are observable, regular, and repetitive and that provide structure for daily life. They can be satisfying and promoting or damaging. Routines require momentary time commitment and are embedded in cultural and ecological contexts (Fiese et al., 2002; Segal, 2004; see Table 6)."

Working with clients on their sexual routines is one of my top 5 ways I fall in love with OT again and again - every time. It reminds me how perfectly situated Occupational Therapy Professionals are to discuss sexuality in our clinical practice. We understand the impact of routines and specifically how occupations are sequenced together to facilitate participation, satisfaction, quality of life, and in some cases a great roll in the hay!

Working with your clients to have and enjoy sex needs to involve a conversation...

Sexual Autonomy for OT Clients Post-Roe v Wade

culture feminist perspective inclusive occupational therapy occupationaltherapy politics quality of life values Oct 15, 2022

It’s taken me a while to process how I feel about the overturning of Roe v. Wade. I had to process how I felt about this personally, and then clinically.

Remember, we are sexual beings first, and OT professionals second.

I speak often about the importance of self-reflection and processing of our sexual values, beliefs, attitudes, and biases to ensure they aren’t influential in our clinical decision making. As painful or uncomfortable as it might be, I encourage all OT professionals, if you haven’t already, to really sit with the personal thoughts and feelings that come up in self-reflection about what this means for you as a sexual person.

The overturning of Roe v. Wade disproportionately affects people that already belong to marginalized groups. This means that there will be additional barriers and dangers around abortion, contraception, reproduction, pregnancy, and child care for all people...

🚨 New Assistive Device for Folks with Disabilities 🚨

equality inclusive occupational therapy occupationaltherapy pleasure quality of life self-care self-love self-pleasure sex sexplay Oct 15, 2022

A fellow baddie, collaborator, advocate, and sex enthusiast, Andrew Gurza, is the brains (and body inspiration) behind an assistive device Occupational Therapy Professionals MUST know about. It’s my pleasure to share about this sex toy adaptor that is on pre-sale right now (more on that later).

The Bump’n Joystick adapter is the first sex toy designed for and by people within the disabled community. Research shows that impaired hand function is the biggest barrier to using sex toys currently on the market – over 50% of physically disabled people surveyed said they struggle to achieve an orgasm solo. The Bump’n joystick removes this barrier and makes self-love possible regardless of hand function, by utilizing a person’s gross motor movements.

So what is it? The Bump’n joystick is about 3 ft. long and made up of a cuddly pillow top and a gender-neutral peg attachment to hold the sex toy in place.

The body...

New Sexual Wellness App for OTs!!

accessible sex education diversity equality inclusive occupational therapy occupationaltherapy pleasure quality of life self-care self-love self-pleasure sexassist sexplay Jul 28, 2022

When I first started addressing sexuality with clients and making recommendations for sex toys I went through the steps of printing out a screen shot of a vibrator on a work computer, folding it in half, and slyly giving it to my client in front of their families.

But now, thanks to the folks at Direct-Rec App, OT clinicians can share sexual wellness products directly and privately with their clients. Dang… where was this 10 years ago!?

Ok, so what is Direct-Rec?

Direct-Rec is a new app that can help clinicians share equipment and product recommendations quickly and securely with patients. The folks at Direct-Rec teamed up with the OT educators at the OT After Dark Podcast to create a category of sexual wellness products with information on how the products can be helpful to specific patients based on their specific challenges, sexual goals, or interests. This might be a vibrator with an extended reach, slings and supports to...

"Changing Attitudes and Changing Practice" with Dr. Farris

acute care therapist brain injury intimacy occupational therapy sexuality Mar 09, 2022

I recently attended a webinar by Dr. Farris on Sexuality and Intimacy After Brain Injury with the Brain Injury Association of America. It was a great presentation that shed light on some important points that we as OTs should be making sure to address and incorporate into our practice.

Consider the Partner

When it comes to addressing sexuality and intimacy with a client after brain injury it’s important to consider the impact on the partner, too. How has this injury impacted the couple? What is the partner’s comfort level with addressing sex and intimacy?

Studies have shown that, often, the client is typically comfortable with discussing changes in their sexual function with their healthcare providers and many individuals who did not receive sexual counseling within the first year after an injury wish they would have.

The impact of a brain injury doesn’t stop with the person directly affected. It’s not uncommon for the...

For the Kinksters

bias culture inclusive occupational therapy occupationaltherapy preferences sex sexual dialogues values Mar 09, 2022

Something OT practitioners need to keep in mind as we (humbly) approach the topic of sex with clients is how people can have sex in countlessly different ways –many that may be unfamiliar to us, and some of ways that may even be considered…

Kinky.

Kink is a broad term that describes aspects of sexuality that fall outside of the mainstream ideas of sexuality. In more detail, The Kink Clinical Practice Guidelines Project defines kink as “…sexual identities, erotic behaviors, sexual interests and fantasies, relationship identities, relationship orientations, and relationship structures between consenting adults not accepted by the dominant culture. We specifically include BDSM (Bondage/Discipline, Dominance/Submission, Sadism/Masochism), Leather, and Fetish as important parts of the umbrella term of kink” (p. 4).

The Kink Clinical Practice Guidelines Project is composed of a multidisciplinary team of healthcare providers, therapists,...

The Not So Sexy Valentine’s Day

accessible sex education certifiedclinicalsexologist intimacy occupational therapy sex sexuality Feb 02, 2022

What’s an OT to do when Valentine’s Day is approaching, the clinic is covered in hearts and cupids, you're wearing red or pink on every portion of your body, yet your client shows up and says, “I’m dreading Valentine’s Day.”

You dig a little deeper.

They say, “I’m dreading Valentine’s Day, because I know my partner will want to have sex with me and I have no desire for it.”

Ok, ok, ok, before you freeze up eyes wide open, here’s what you talk about:

Validate them: The hardest part about low desire when “sex is the last thing on your mind” is when it’s met with your partner’s higher desire – among all the things you’re juggling this can feel like a recipe for inadequacy, insecurity, resentment, guilt.

Knowledge is pleasure! When your clients can understand the changes that happen in their body and how this impacts sexual health, they can also enlighten your partner...

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Author

Kathryn Ellis (she/her)

Hi! I'm an Occupational Therapist, ASSECT Certified Sexuality Counselor, and pleasure enthusiast! Here to write about all things sexuality + OT related. If you're an OT looking to learn more poke around the website. If you think you'd like to work with me for sexuality counseling, check out www.drkathrynellis.com to learn more!

FREE CEU: This is How We Do It: Sexuality & Occupational Therapy

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Recorded Course: OT and LGBTQIA+ Inclusive Practice

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